1. live with loving kindness. to live in the moment takes practice. to then apply compassion to self and to others takes dedication ! find opportunities to surprise yourself by transforming unpleasant circumstances into avenues to apply loving kindness to yourself and others. realizing that we are all flawed and need to grown and having compassion for the self aids in nurturing the growth of self which allows us to be more compassionate towards others.
2. get to know yourself. acknowledge how you feel without imposing an opinion about it. there is no should. letting go of expectations of the mind and observing them can teach you about yourself. noting your behavior can give you inflection and direct you to understanding why you feel the way you do and perhaps, if the feeling is unpleasant, relieve yourself of the burden of the unpleasantness of the experience.
3. let go. after an experience, if you can't find a good place in your consciousness for it, let it go. let go of your pains. let go of your worries. let go of your anger. let go of your trauma. breathe in freshness and breathe out the baggage you carry. cry. talk. sleep. write. paint. play. build. rebuild. let the negativity out of you.
4. balance. there are infinitely large and infinitely small parts of everything. there are long term and short term effects of our actions. there exists dichotomy in nearly every part of our existence.
5. learn. nourish your mind with information. find subjects that interest you and dive in! or, test the waters with your toes, but find subjects that stimulate your mind and seek understanding about them.
6. read. make sure that part of information integration is from written words. your mind absorbs information in many different ways, but please don't skip reading because it is a task. reading will help your eyes and mind be sharp and keen.
7. add layers to your lenses. when you're seeking worldly facts, try to put yourself in the midst of the context and carry the value with you. you can use these values when evaluating circumstances. the more dynamic the lenses, the more dynamic the understanding.
8. make friends. human interaction is valuable in innumerable ways. on a chemical level, your reward system is equipped with hug-chemical-happiness. as many anthropologists and historians have concluded, humans desire community and acceptance.
9. trim the fat. you can't be friends with everyone you will ever meet. toxic or unhealthy relationships can be draining. there is a point that you have to cut out people who are unhealthy for you. relationships including family! i know many people who are in toxic relationships with their families and would be better off estranged. don't stay because you have to. evaluate circumstances and do what is best for the self.
10. centeredness is the flow. every point in this list and the subsequent points are to help the self become centered. mindfulness in key to centeredness and the flow.
11. enjoy your body. you have love handles. stretch marks. that scar on your face. your thighs should touch unless your thighs happen to not touch. your skin gets rough. put lotion on it. look at yourself naked in the mirror and tell yourself you're beautiful, because i promise you are. enjoy the pleasurable parts of your body. they are meant to be enjoyed. explore them and figure out how to feel more pleasure. you're wired to have enjoyable physical experiences, take advantage of that.
12. have innumerable orgasms. an orgasm is an autonomic nervous response. it releases oxytocin and endorphins (rewards) in your brain. we have evolved to have orgasms. do it. have sex. masturbate. if you're stressed. in pain. unhappy. feeling uncentered. have an orgasm.
13. enjoy the company of people you love. even when you're in the midst of an argument with a loved one, cherish them. try to remember you wouldn't be happy without them. life is fleeting and unpredictable so remain mindful of the company you keep and inviting the ability to enjoy it.
14. life goes on within you and without you. oh george. you were so wise. the ego is a powerful part of the mind. if left unchecked it will quickly become unhappy with anything it is not already incline d to enjoy. remain mindful that the world and everything exists whether or not you do.
15. enjoy the past. it has brought you to where you are now. life can be trying and unawesome things happen. but it lead you to you in the present. don't regret or pine of the past. enjoy it like your own personal movie, accessible whenever you desire. carry the morals of past experiences with you, not the baggage.
16. be an exemplary friend. give unabashedly to those you love. find ways to help them and love them and be there for them. give love. be love. remember that they don't eat any seafood or that they're allergic to cauliflower. engage with them about things they are into. call them every once in a while to remind them that you care. even if it's literally only to tell them that you care about them.
17. be an exemplary human. volunteer. bring more love into the world. foster something. give your time. pick up trash. all things you're capable of and will bring goodness to you via the world being a better place.
18. give back. whether it be to someone who gives to you or the earth. find ways to show gratitude for your life by giving back.
19. find the joys in doing things you don't want to do. watch your favorite mindless television while folding laundry. listen to the most epic upbeat playlist ever while you're doing cardio. bond with your family while you run errands. enjoy the coziness of huddling around a fire when it rains and you're camping. find the tolerable parts of uncomfortable situations. if you're forced to interact with an acquaintance you don't enjoy or getting your teeth pulled, find something you can hold on to that isn't uncomfortable and feel that in the forefront of your mind.
20. have reasonable expectations.
21. listen. people often want you to know things. listen without thinking about your retort. you will likely have time to remember what you wanted to contribute to the interaction. be mindful in listening and you'll hear more than you'd ever imagined.
22. smile. force a smile. find something that makes you happy. bring it to the front of consciousness and smile. keep your smile going and you will feel more happiness.
23. seek to be in tune with the self. you can smell a bear in the woods. you can hear the fluttering of insects around you. you can feel when you need to give yourself a break. tune into yourself.
24. eat beets. or kale. probably both. eat all sorts of nutritious foods. eat them more than you eat processed foods. your body will thank you for your entire life.
25. work out. get yourself worked into a shvitz. your body and mind will be more centered. working out is my prozac and my spinach. well, that and spinach.
26. get out of civilization and into the woods. i have never spent time in the woods and felt disconnected from my roots. getting away from civilization and letting nature teach you. nurture you. teach you lessons. feel the energy of being a part of the whole. remember conservationism. disconnect from technologies and the internet.
27. find things that make you happy and do them. paint. run. play music. garden. write. contemplate. do exercise. nap. spend time with those most important to you.
28. accept everyone. you don't need to like everyone, or every quality of everyone, but accept them for the entirety of selves. this includes yourself. accept yourself, your short comings and strong points. accepting yourself doesn't mean you shouldn't strive to be better, but is an acknowledgement of...
29. accept(ing) reality. the existence of the rainbow is dependent on the conical photoreceptors in your eyes; to animals with out cones, the rainbow does not exist. acknowledge reality. live in it. commit to change in the future if you'd like. always seek the whole picture. the micro picture. the macro picture. accept your existence for what it is, then work towards what you'd like it to be. i encourage you to seek rainbows and be in awe of how cool it is to have evolved to be able to create them.
30. accept change. learn to acknowledge the discomforts of change. learn to be at peace with impermanence. it is the only constant in our lives.
